what lingered...

"What lingered after them was not life, which always overcomes natural death, but the most trivial list of mundane facts: a clock ticking on a wall, a room dim at noon, and the outrageousness of a human being thinking only of herself. Her brain going dim to all else, but flaming up in precise points of pain, personal injury, lost dreams. Every other loved one receding as though across a vast ice floe, shrinking to black dots waving tiny arms, out of hearing. Then the rope thrown over the beam, the sleeping pill dropped in the palm with the long, lying lifeline, the window thrown open, the oven turned on, whatever. They made us participate in their own madness (...) We couldn't imagine the emptiness of a creature who put a razor to her wrist and opened her veins, the emptiness and the calm."

- Jeffrey Eugenides "The Virgin Suicides" -


I think in a way there's something intriguing about suicide - we may be aware of reasons why people decide to end their lives, but there is always something mysterious and dark about it. And like Eugenides says - there's always that aspect of emptiness, calmness and selfishness connected to it, which makes it difficult to comprehend. And as for mundane facts that a suicider leaves behind - I guess that when somebody kills themselves, people are trying to find reasons why, so they analyse all that you left behind and try to give meaning to the most trivial things, when there often is no meaning attached to them whatsoever.

It took me an awful lot of time to find all these objects that would fit the photo. It's not exactly what I planned to do with it. I'm still not sure about the effect. But if I didn't post it now, I probably wouldn't do it another day.

I changed the colour to a very pale, grey shade of blue to put an emphasis on the coldness, calmness. And also so that it reminded of that time of the dawn when the sky is still quite dim and it's still not really morning, but the sky begins to change, goes brighter and you often see the shades of blue.

I encourage everyone who comes across this picture to drop me a line saying what you think of it, especially some constructive criticism. That would be very much appreciated. And I am very much opened to a discussion about this deviation